MAY 24, 2017
Derica Jackson , Volunteer

“It was a real challenge and ultimately his therapies and everything else kind of forced an earlier retirement than I had planned.”

Becoming a parent unexpectedly at an older age brings a unique set of challenges, often leading these families to need additional support from our community. Many who find themselves at the San Antonio Food Bank are grandparents raising their grandchildren like our client Brenda, who is pictured above.

“I’ll be very honest. It was much more fun being just the grandmother because you give up that role when you go to raise a child.”

As a retired teacher with a master’s degree in Education, helping children is a way of life for Brenda. Though at 61, she did not plan to have a student of her own to care for – her 11-year-old grandson with special needs.

“It was a real challenge and ultimately his therapies and everything else kind of forced an earlier retirement than I had planned.”

She expressed how adjusting to her new role was not easy, in fact, it was quite challenging.

“After he came, I couldn’t tell you the last time I went to buy a pair of shoes. It was that drastic, I didn’t go out with friends anymore. You (can) become very isolated, especially with a special needs child. You can’t just hire a babysitter for him.”

Brenda recalls feeling weighed down by the emotional and financial burden that came along with her loving sacrifice to raise Avery, who is autistic.

“That truly, even though I was employed at that time, and making what I thought was good money, certainly took every cent I had.”

After being granted full custody of Avery, Brenda didn’t anticipate they would later have to start all over again. Recently, they found a new place after a period of homelessness.

“I, by all means, was probably making more than average wages in this town when this first started happening.”

When she came to the San Antonio Food Bank, she not only found food assistance, but also support system, friends, and hope. Brenda also received help applying for federal benefits that drastically improved their situation at home.

“I think many of us are in a position of where we are one disaster away from being hungry, being homeless, filing for bankruptcy. I mean whether it is an illness, a custody battle, a fire in your home, a disaster of some sort that is all it can take to wipe a family out.”

Though she jokes about preparing a lot of macaroni and cheese or pasta with butter and Avery not noticing, she is grateful that they can now visit the local food bank for nutritious food that includes fresh fruit and vegetables.

“I don’t know if I could have continued to do it. You need somebody to help lift you up, and that is part of what the food bank did: just lift me up. You know? Take one less worry from me.”

Brenda looks forward to what the future holds for them as she continues to raise Avery.

“I want him to be happy. I want him to be a contributing member of society. I want him to find joy in what he does.”